HEART MATTERS

“Therefore Jesus also, that He might sanctify the people with His own blood, suffered outside the gate.  Therefore let us go forth to Him, outside the camp, bearing His reproach.”    Hebrews 13:12-13

Have you ever felt outside the camp? Have you ever felt the reproach of being rejected, ostracized, or ignored as though you were invisible to your peers?  It stings doesn’t it?  If we’re honest we can admit that those experiences are some of the most hurtful moments of our lives. I’m willing to bet you can quickly recall and instance when this has happened to you without any hesitation.  It hurt us whether we we’re the kid who came to school on a Monday morning only to discover everyone was still reeling over a classmates’ weekend party of which we knew nothing about because we were never invited.  And today, even as adults, it still hurts us to find out we’ve been purposefully left out of some get together or event by those we thought we were close to.  It’s a universal principle-everyone has a desire to be loved, to feel welcomed, and to be embraced-especially by those we love, admire, and care about.  Non-believers and believers alike all want to be accepted inside the camp. It’s true! No one wants to be left out or forced to go outside of the camp.

However, according to the scripture above, as believer’s, not only are we to be okay when we’re not accepted inside the camp, we should be moving of our own volition away from the camp-to the place where Christ is.  Jesus is outside the camp!  If you’re a Christian, your place is with Him!  As you move and have your being established by Him, the camp will more and more become unaccepting and at times even a hostile environment. The moment you became a Christian, spiritually speaking your eviction notice was activated. For it was at that very moment when you believed that Jesus is The Christ, when you became a new creation in Him (2nd Corinth 5:17), that you were relocated and the world ceased to be your true home.  At that moment your identity changed, your eternal destination changed, and all things became new!  At that moment, whether you realized it or not, there were some things, some behaviors, and some people in your present, who in the future would be destined to become a part of your past.  As you begin to “put on Christ daily,” quickly changing in some areas and slowly transforming in others, the most comfortable and familiar places will begin to shift and rearrange. The more you unabashedly proclaim your newfound faith and begin living in accordance with the Word of God, the more you’ll experience a pulling away of certain family members and friends. The more you take a stand on your convictions, the more you’ll see that some of your peeps have decided they no longer wish to keep company with you. The sanctification process is real! But take heart, you’re in good company. Jesus knows what it’s like to be outside the camp!

Continue reading Outside The Camp →

HEART MATTERS

“All things are lawful for me, but all things are not helpful.  All things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any.”  1st Corinthians 6:12

Wow!  Did you get that?!  Have you ever been with a group of believers, chose to abstain from something, and immediately someone judged you for it?  They perceived your decision not to partake as a “holier than thou” act of self-righteousness or some sort of manifestation of legalism.  Your decision to go against the grain can cause them to regard you as being “ridiculous”, “uptight”, a “party-pooper”, or a down right “kill joy.”  It’s those areas for us, the ones which are not the known black and white outright sins, which can trip us up and lead to resentment, judgement, and division.  It’s those complex grey areas in which some believers have liberty and freedom but others need to opt out of, refrain from, and restrict themselves, which can complicate our relationships. Whether you chose to forgo attending a rated R movie or something as simple as refusing to partake in having desert, when we’re socializing it can be hard to stick to our boundaries and convictions. It can be difficult to escape being misunderstood. When others enter the picture the lines the Lord’s drawn exclusively for us can be off-putting and confusing.  Unfortunately at times we believers are prone to jumping to the conclusion that the things one believer chooses to abstain from are same things they also believe all other believers in Christ should be abstaining from as well.  When a Christian publicly takes a stand in the grey areas of life among other believers, even if it’s in a relatively small social gathering or fellowship, we automatically assume they’re implying we all should be embracing the same standard for our own lives.  As a result we respond by either feeling judged or by becoming judgmental. We react as if either they’re being foolish or as though it’s being suggested we’re being failures.  So we become either defiant or defensive or both.

I’m not sure why it is we forget as individuals our walk with Christ, in many respects, are uniquely different from one another.  My walk isn’t your walk.  My weaknesses are different, my strengths are different.  My pace is different, and my gait is different. The areas you tread with ease might cause me to trip and fall-and vice versa.   Only the Lord knows where we are and what we can and cannot handle-our walk with Him has to be determined by Him.  We can’t even establish it for ourselves yet alone compare it to others. .

Continue reading It May Be Lawful, But Is It Helpful? →

Heart Matters

“And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”  John 8:32

Oh if only everyone walked in the truth!  One can only dream.  Imagine if it were so just how easy would it be to communicate and agree  with each other!  If only we could: recognize the truth; own the truth; believe the truth; acknowledge the truth; and speak out of-the truth.  If only that were true.  Unfortunately many of us have allowed the truth to become contaminated and tainted for us.  The enemy knows all it takes is a tiny piece of deception to pollute the truth.  The enemy knows that without truth revealed the meaningful areas of our lives can begin to feel like a lie.  The enemy knows if he can get just one party to embrace a lie, (especially an internal one created by ourselves specifically for the purposes to allow us to feel right, justified, and innocent), he can kill off a part of what was meant to be a thriving healthy relationship.  Yeah I believe its the lie that’s a result of the “sin of omission”, that which we choose ignore and refuse to validate, that does us in the most when it comes to our relationships.  It’s that type of deception that will block the door of real restoration every single time.  Any attempt to have a serious conversation will veer off course, get stumped and sidetracked, and end in frustration without accomplishing any ground towards restoration.  For the party clinging to the lie and refusing to walk in the truth, anything that so even hints at blowing off the lid and exposing it entirely, will be immediately and viciously rejected.  Aha! That’s what Jack Nicholson meant when he said in the movie “A Few Good Men” -“you can’t handle the truth!”  Can you?

What’s really sad is believers are also prone to this weakness.  We deny truth because of our pride, our desire to win, our selfishness, our self-centeredness, and/or our inability to own our stuff because of the pain we’d have to realize as a result.  Here’s the thing-when we fail to walk in the truth of whatever situation we may find ourselves in, we can cause others pain. For whatever it is we’re denying it also means we’re denying every accompanying detail that goes along with it, such as the grace, the love, and forgiveness we’ve received from other person.  When we deny truth we damage others.  When we deny truth we diminish our witness for Christ.  When we deny truth we delay healing.

Continue reading Walking In THE TRUTH! →

Heart Matters

“And the Angel of the LORD appeared to him, and said to him, “The LORD is with you, you mighty man of valor!” Judges 6:12

When someone says a person called them out of their name, it usually means they have referred to or addressed them in a way that’s less than admirable. Being called out of ones’name really equates to being cursed out.  It’s never a good thing and no one ever likes when it happens to them.  But did you know that God will sometime call us out of our names as well?  And guess what?  When He does, it’s always a good, righteous, and holy thing.  When He calls us something different than we’re presently living in and displaying through our character, He’s in essence saying:this is who you were meant to be; this is who I’m going to make you become. Everything that God speaks is the truth!  You see, The One who created you, knows you better than any other.  Yes your Creator knows why He created you and who you were created to be.  Even as believers often times we can find ourselves living in opposition to what our Christian character should be and our calling in Christ Jesus is. Right there in the midst of our lives while we’re living in a fog clouded by ignorance, apathy, distraction and self-realization, the Lord is able to meet us where we are and confidently call us out with a new name (or title).  We can be living in a completely opposite way from what He’s purposed us to live and yet He lovingly redirects us and blesses us with a new and admirable name.  Why? Because He knows “we can do all things through Christ Jesus” Philippians 4:13. Because He knows it’ll be HIM working in and through us to accomplish the things He’s called us to do.  Because we we’re created for His glory and His purposes “..before the foundation of the world.” Ephesians 1:4  Because we we’re bought with an incredible price 1st Corinthians 6:20.

Regarding the above scripture, God called Gideon, a man who at that very moment was hiding from the Midianites, a “mighty man of valor”.  Gideon must have heard that greeting and immediately turned around to look for the real man the Angel of the LORD was addressing.  When he saw no one else he had to have been like “who me?”.  During this time the Israelites were dealing with the consequences of their sin of idolatry.  The Lord had given them over to the hand of the Midianites for the last seven years.  Every time the Israelites would grow their crops, the Midianites would come and jack everything they needed to survive.  So here is Gideon, impoverished with his people Israel, hiding out from their oppressors threshing in a wine press instead of out in the open where the chaff could more easily separate from the wheat. Here is Gideon, trying to survive, working under a very real and severe threat, operating out of a valid fear, when the Angel of the LORD appears to him and calls him out of his name.  

Continue reading Called Out Of Your Name →

HEART MATTERS

“For do I now persuade men, or God? Or do I seek to please men? For if I still pleased men, I would not be a bondservant of Christ.”  Galatians 1:10

“Can we all just get along?” This was Rodney King’s plea of frustration in response to all the racial upheaval which occurred after someone filmed the police severely beating him during a supposedly arrest attempt. “Can we all just get along?” It’s also the heart cry of all those who find themselves in bondage to a people pleasing personality bend.  I know because I used to be one of those people.  Are you a people pleaser?  I believe people find themselves entrapped to this behavior for many different reasons: a naturally sweet disposition; a dysfunctional family upbringing; strong insecurities; low self esteem; a need to control, etc.  People pleasing could result from any number of reasons because it’s a sort of tailor made, individualized, ailment. I think one of the main reasons I became one was because of my mother’s pain. She was the black sheep of her family and so I think I tried to overcompensate for the areas that were lacking in her life. Even as a little girl I desperately hoped to make and keep her happy. Why would I take on such a task? Because seeing her happy made me happy.  Seeing her happy freed me to be happy.  I remember seeing her pain over her relationship with her own mother and thinking I didn’t like seeing my mom so sad because when she was sad it caused me to feel sad.  I truly believe that’s when it all began for me.  But also I think it (my people pleasing nature) eventually evolved into something more.  My weakness of needing to please others grew into a sort of manipulation tactic as I realized it allowed me to attain the peace I so greatly desired-even if it was only for a little while.  I grew up in a close community of family.  My grandmother and her sisters all bought houses within walking distance of each other.  My mom and her sister did the same. I quickly learned that if I acted sweet and agreeable with my elders, they’d be pleased with me. My submission and obedience would cause them to smile, to be happy, and overall, it would make them like me.  As a result sometimes I’d even be rewarded with a nice compliment (words of affirmation is still my love language) or better yet a piece of candy.  My people pleasing most times yielded a false sense of euphoria for me and so I embraced it and allowed it to become a major part of my character.  At the time I didn’t know the price I’d pay for it in the future. As a child my propensity for people pleasing seemed to be an asset.  But as an adult I’d soon learn it’s a deficit instead.  People pleasing always causes problems in the end.  Disguised as a representative of peace and resolution, in reality, it’s more of a catalyst for contention and resentment.  So believers be warned.  There’s no room for people pleasing in the economy of God!  People pleasing will come into direct conflict with the call of God on your life.

Continue reading The Problem With People Pleasing →

HEART TO HEART

“We then who are strong ought to bear with the scruples of the weak, and not to please ourselves. Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, leading to edification. For even Christ did not please Himself; but as it is written, “The reproaches of those who reproached You fell on Me.”  Romans 15: 1-3

Have you ever asked someone for forgiveness who you really felt should be asking you to forgive them? Many times my girlfriends will confide in me regarding some ongoing dispute or disagreement their having with a loved one.  I can’t tell you how many times I hear them despairingly say “but why do I always have to be the bigger person!” Unfortunately this is an ongoing reoccurring theme especially with my married friends. When it comes to conflict resolution with their spouses, they grow weary of always being the one who’s willing to humble themselves in an effort to make up.  Whether they’re speaking to me to simply vent or seeking godly advice, when I give my spiritual two cents, their response is always the same.  In exasperation they cry out “why am I always the one who has to be the bigger person?” or “I’m tired of always having to be the bigger person”.  Complaints about: always being the one who has to examine her heart; always being the one who has to own and confess her part in the wrongdoing; and always being the one who asks for forgiveness first. They want to know why they always have to be the ones who takes the first step (and the majority of the steps) to keep the peace.

Soooo, let’s talk about it!  Why you do you have to be the bigger person you ask? Weelll…..because you asked!  The very fact that you’re tired of having to be the bigger person declares that you’re once again willing to be the bigger person. The fact that you’re concerned about restoration, the fact you’re willing to confess and own your part, the fact that you want resolution, AND the fact that you’re willing to humble yourself in order to be reconciled-all testifies to the fact that His Spirit lives in you! The reason you want to know why you have to be, is because you are called to be!

Continue reading The Bigger Person →

Heart Matters

“Then Job answered the LORD and said: “I know that You can do everything, And that no purpose of Yours can be withheld from You.  You asked, ‘Who is this who hides counsel without knowledge?’ Therefore I have uttered what I did not understand, Things too wonderful for me, which I did not know.  Listen, please, and let me speak;  You said, ‘I will question you, and you shall answer Me.’  “I have heard of You by the hearing of the ear, But now my eye sees You.  Therefore I abhor myself, And repent in dust and ashes.”  Job 42:1-6

I’m a left handed, supposedly right brained person who just so happens to be very analytical as well.  I love details, structure, rules and order-you know, so all the pieces of the puzzle can fit perfectly together.  I love mysteries, forensic science, and anything that encourages you to think outside of the box (within God’s order) in order to arrive at the correct conclusion.  I’m always trying to figure it out.  Unfortunately this cerebral bent has caused me to dissect every unwelcomed and in my opinion unwarranted circumstance that’s come into my life and the lives of those I care deeply about. In my quest to know the reason why, many times the conclusions I arrived at have led me to overly access and wrongfully judge.  When something new and difficult entered my life, I’d think maybe I’m having this issue because: of a sin problem; or maybe it’s due to my lack of discipline; or perhaps it has to do with that stronghold I’m refusing to let go of?  Well it could be those things but it also could be for reasons I was never meant to know of.  God is Creator of both the things that are seen and unseen.  He is Sovereign over both the natural world and the supernatural.  I’m not knocking examining oneself before the Lord because that’s always a good thing. A spiritually mature and wise person will make sure he/she keeps short accounts with the LORD. However, we err if we think that if we just keep searching and examining, we will eventually be able to figure it all out.  We must never think examining ourselves will be (or should be) the catalyst for the Lord to reveal to us the reason why we’re facing what we’re facing.  For those of you who have analytical minds, I know what you’re thinking.   “But wait a minute, truth be told, isn’t there a reason for everything?”  Yes there is!  But that doesn’t mean we have a right to be privy to it!  The secret things belong to God! (Deut.29:9).

Continue reading When You Seek To Know Why-Surrender Yourself to WHO! →

Heart Matters

“And do this, knowing the time, that now it is high time to awake out of sleep; for now our salvation is nearer than when we first believed.  The night is far spent, the day is at hand.  Therefore let us cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armor of light.  Let us walk properly, as in the day, not in revelry and drunkenness, not in lewdness and lust, not in strife and envy.  But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to fulfill its lusts.”  Romans 13: 11-13

Happy New Year!  I’ve been thinking instead of falling into the same old habit of coming up with a new years resolution for 2017,(one that’s sure to start fizzling by the end of the month), I should instead focus on tweaking my spiritual walk with the Lord.  After all HE knows better than anyone what’s needed in my life for 2017 as well as what’s not.  So why not start this fresh new year seeking Him and His perfect will in regards to becoming a new and improved you?!  Now I’m not saying The LORD is willing to tell us everything HE has in store for us in 2017.  I’m sure He has many blessings to bestow upon each of us this year.  Also, I’m just as certain there will be some difficult and challenging circumstances along the way, all meant to stretch and grow us in our walk and service for HIM.  As such, I have to say I for one am very thankful He doesn’t begin the new year showing us everything He has in store for us.  I mean there have been some things He has called me to in the last couple of years that if I had known about them beforehand, He would have had to drag me forward kicking and screaming. (Yes I’m that child that sometimes the Lord has to grab by the bridle and forcefully lead into the direction He wants me to go).  The good news is that thanks to Jesus, I am getting better at both submitting and surrendering to His perfect will for my life!

So as I pondered this new year with an eternal perspective I thought the best place to start is always in God’s Word.  It’s full of wisdom and understanding, knowledge and instruction, reproof and correction, directives and commands-all for those HE loves and those who love HIM.  “For the  word of  God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.”Hebrews 4:12  God’s Word can lead us to Christ, help us abide in Christ, develop us for the cause of Christ, and change us to reveal Christ to others!  God’s Word is THE TRUTH- It’s everything!  Yes, as believers we definitely should begin 2017 more committed than ever to spend more and more time reading and studying our Bibles!

The Bible clearly tells Christians there are some things we should put on and some things we definitely need to put off if we’re serious about following our Lord.  Usually when I begin a new year the things I want to put off go something like this:  -the baby weight I’ve been carrying around for the last 19 years; -my love affair with caffeine, chocolate, and pasteries; -the procrastination I’ve been prone to all my life; -being a night owl who never wants to go to bed and as a result will always snooze the morning alarm-several times. And since like most I’d like to improve with every new year here are some of the things I’d want to put on:-anything that would disguise the fact that I’ve become middle aged and I’m actually now showing it, such as: hair color, false eyelashes, fad diets and a few new pieces of stylish clothing and shoes (I know pretty shallow right? Well I discovered growing old gracefully is not as easy as it sounds, although I am now committed to doing so); a consistent plan for a healthy diet and exercise because pre-menopausal hormones aint no joke (this one I can’t let go of because my body is insisting on it); trying out a new class/hobby such as pottery, foreign language, etc.

See some of these aren’t so bad, but what spiritual value do they have?  Would it not be better to purge myself of the the things which matter most to God?  Would it not be more valuable for me to focus on clothing myself with the articles the Lord instructs me to in His Word? I think so! The Bible says “But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at his physical stature, because I have refused him.  For the LORD does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”    1 Samuel 16:7   Now I’m not saying that we’re not to take care of our physical bodies-we are.  “Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own?”  1 Corinthians 6:19  However, we must keep it in perspective.  “For bodily exercise profits a little, but godliness is profitable for all things, having promise of the life that now is and of that which is to come. This is a faithful saying and worthy of all acceptance.” 1 Timothy 4:8-9  Our outer man will one day perish, but our inner man will live forever! 

So what about you?  Are you ready to properly prioritize the “new you” for 2017? If so, then this post is for you!  Let’s take a moment to look at how we can put off the old man and put on the new man.  Let’s see how we can trade in our old ragged garments for brand spanking new ones. Let’s take a minute to stop and step behind the curtain so to speak for the most important costume change of all as we align our hearts with the heart of God! Let’s get excited about how HE Himself is going to transform us in the year 2017!

Continue reading Putting On/Putting Off →

Heart Matters

“Now there in Jerusalem by the Sheep Gate a pool, which is called in Hebrew, Bethesda, having five porches.  In these lay a great multitude of sick people, blind, lame, paralyzed, waiting for the moving of the water.  For a angel went down at a certain time into the pool and stirred up the water; then whoever stepped in first, after the stirring of the water, was made well of whatever disease he had.  Now a certain man was there who had an infirmity thirty-eight years.  When Jesus saw him lying there, and knew that he already had been in that condition a long time, He said to him, “Do you want to be made well?” John 5: 1-6

For some reason whenever I read this scripture, Jesus’ question really stands out to me.  I can never read past it.  It stops me in my tracks every single time.  I find myself pausing so I can think on it and try to properly process The Lord’s question to this broken man.  I wonder-why did Jesus ask him if he wanted to be made well?  I mean wasn’t it obvious that he did?!  The man had been crippled by his illness for 38 years.  Wouldn’t the fact that he was near the pool which everyone knew an angel occasionally visited, providing healing for the first person in, lead to the logical conclusion that indeed the diseased man was there in hopes of being healed?  Why then did Jesus ask him if he wanted to be made well?

If we would have come across the man camped out around the pool among so many others who were disabled and diseased we would automatically assume, like everyone else there, he too desperately wanted to be healed.  Yet when Jesus asked him if he wanted to be made well, he didn’t respond with an emphatic “YES!” or “YES I DO!” or even “YES! can you help me get closer to the pool?!” Notice Jesus asked him a direct, close ended question which required a simple “yes” or “no” response.  However his answer (verse 7) instead seems to be an explanation of why he hasn’t yet been healed. He told Jesus he didn’t have anyone to put him into the pool when the water is stirred and while he’s on his way someone always steps down into the pool before him.  Instead of an affirmative response his answer seems to be a deflection of sorts.  Within his response there’s evidence of both self-pity and self-defense.  Outwardly he looked like someone in desperate need of healing.  But it seems Jesus knew the man had an even greater need-there was something going on on the inside that needed addressing too.

The man by the pool of Bethesda’s reply to the Lord lead me to believe Jesus asked him that question for more than just the obvious reason. The fact that Jesus even asked him the question in the first place naturally implies the ailing man must have had some conflicting feelings regarding being healed. Jesus’ question, coupled with the man’s response, seems to suggest there’s more going on here than meets the eye.  When the all knowing LORD of the universe asks a question, it’s never because He doesn’t already know the answer.  His questions are to make us think and come to the realization of some kind.

Continue reading Wilt Thou Be Made Whole? →

Heart Matters

“being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”  Philippians 1:6

This is my life verse.  But there was some things the Lord had to orchestrate in order to get me to the place of being able to claim it as my own.  As I share my testimony, my story of how I came to faith in Christ, I hope it encourages you to share your story as well.

I think (thank) my mom did a great job of introducing me to God.  It wasn’t that she was a true believer.  Fact is I actually led her to faith in Christ.  But she did have a belief system: she believed God existed; that Jesus was/is His Son and One with the Father; and that we are to be morally good people towards others.  That was my foundation.  Those were the the stones that cultivated my consciousness and curiosity of God.  I remember how as a young child of about 9 or 10 years old,I’d wake up on a Saturday morning, and walk (by myself) the 7 or 8 blocks to knock on the rectory door.  I recall the two doors being very large, enormous, and intimidating.  But I didn’t hesitate to approach them because I remembered the kindness and the smile of the one I went to see.  I knew that “father” Al (as he was called) would always welcome my visit with opened arms.  I can’t remember how many times I actually visited with him.  Perhaps it was only once.  But it left a lasting impression on my life and it’s always the place where my memory of my journey with God begins.  I traveled to the rectory to see “father”Al because I had questions.  I had met him while attending the church that adjoined to the rectory.  I knew that I could go to him and he’d take the time to answer any questions I had.  The nuns would call him to the front and he’d welcome me into the office off to the right.  I remembered feeling as though the large brown leather chair would swallow me whole.  But never mind that, I went there with a purpose-I needed to know all about this God.  Who was He?  Where did He come from?  Why did He have to come here and die if He was going to resurrect and go back to where He came from?  Why can’t I see Him now?! 

Way back then my heart was desiring to know all about to HIM.  I was drawn to Jesus.  As an innocent child I didn’t question for a minute that HE was God.  I knew it was true!  Even back then I believe I had a sincere desire to follow and stay close to Him. (But there was much more I needed to understand-like my sin nature and how it separated me from Him). I remember my aunt Celestine bringing me a beautifully beaded rosary back from a popular cathedral in New York City.  She taught me how to use it to pray.  As a child I would spend many days setting aside time to pray my rosary.  I had already understood the earthly principle of people pleasing and so I set about making sure I was pleasing to God. He was so special and I knew it, so I also wanted to be special to Him.  I felt I had to do what it took to make that happen.  In eight grade my private school held mass each morning one hour before class began.  Guess what I tried to do every single school day? You guessed it!  I woke up early and tried to attend mass.  I was often late but I felt like catching some of it would be better than not attending at all. Many Sunday’s I walked my blind auntie Joan to mass.  It was some of my fondest memories of my time with her.  We’d talk the entire way there and the whole way back.  So like I said, I was a pretty religious little girl who thought she had a good sincere heart towards God.  God knew my heart better than I did and so He never intended to leave me to religion.  Religion just wouldn’t do-no I was meant for relationship-with Him!

Continue reading my Testimony →