HEART MATTERS

“Come now, and let us reason together,” Says the LORD, “Though your sins are like scarlet, They shall be white as snow;Though they are red like crimson, They shall be as wool.  If you are willing and obedient, you shall eat the good of the land;…”  Isaiah 1:18-19

Okay so every time I go through something difficult, especially something that catches me off guard, the first thing I want to do is “process” it.  Processing is my method of analyzing this difficult thing with the goal of placing it where it  rightfully belongs in my life.  I have to take whatever it is and evaluate it from every angle and in light of everything that pertains to it.  Since I like to talk, I normally “process” by talking to God about it.  I speak to Him about it openly, honestly and out loud.  When I’m finished speaking, I then continue to process it quietly in my mind.  The more “it” hurts, stings, disappoints and sinks me, the longer I take to process it.  Life is complicated!

I have to admit that my tendency to process things before addressing them or tucking them away made me feel very mature and even a little bit spiritually superior.  I mean I know so many people who respond to life by unapologetically letting their feelings rip-every time.  So this ability to process must be something good and positive right? Doesn’t God’s Word say self-control is a fruit of the Spirit?  Indeed it is!  But that doesn’t mean holding on to something to thoroughly process it, is necessarily a good thing.  Here’s what I believe the Lord showed me about my process of processing.

First, although I normally process by speaking to the Lord about it, it’s almost always a one sided conversation.  It looks like prayer but actually its more like i’m venting to the Lord.  I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that either, however, I feel its important for it not to end there.  The problem is I’m talking to Him, but I’m not willing to stop for one second to listen to Him. I’m speaking to Him about it but I have no room at the time to receive what He might want to say to me about it. I’m processing by bringing it to the Lord yet refusing to filter it in light of The Gospel.  I’m talking, no I’m venting, and it’s a one way street.  Houston we have a problem!

Secondly, my process of processing before the Lord is actually my way of presenting my case to the Lord.  You see there’s a motive behind it all.  Like a lawyer who carefully lays out his case before the judge, I meticulously set about trying to convince the Lord why I have every right to respond to my situation the way my flesh wants to.  As I go on and on prosecuting the offender and attacking his/her credibility before the Lord, I actually begin to believe it’s okay to demand justice.  Instead of becoming more Christ-like, I unwittingly identify with the great accuser-even while I’m in the midst of speaking to my Lord.

Thirdly, my processing never leads to peace. It only sinks me deeper which is why I would continue to meditate on it even after talking to God about it.  As I replayed the hurt over and over again in my mind it only added fuel to the fire of my own self-pity and my self perceived rights.  As such, I was reflecting on my difficulties mainly from a human perspective instead of a heavenly one.  Therefore my processing was stealing my peace even more!

Lastly, the act of processing my problems causes me to deceive myself.  I’d begin to consider my options as if I actually had any.  Am I not a follower of Christ?  Yes I am!  Therefore my only option is to respond to life in obedience to Him.  I try to disregard this fact because I know The Lord’s way will always include: Love, Forgiveness, Mercy and Grace!  In the process of processing my troubles I usually want to ignore the great responsibility and incredible privilege He gives to His children of reflecting Him to others.   Allowing others to see Christ in us is never more powerful than when we do so in the midst of conflict and contention.

The Lord showed me instead of “processing” I should pray.  True prayer that encompasses approaching the Lord with a heart that’s willing to openly share and also which is prepared to both listen and obey.  It is through this process of prayer  that the Lord will comfort my heart, calm my fears, and change my mind.   As I pray for those who hurt and offend me, He will fill me with both love and compassion for them.  The result will be a right heart and therefore a right response.  Since I’m analytical and still will want to “process” something, I can now process all that the Lord did in my heart when I turned to Him with my hurts.

So how do you “process” conflict in your life?  What’s your heart attitude regarding how to go forward?  Are you willing to pray for your enemy and love those who spitefully use you?  A heart that’s willingly to be obedient is a heart The Lord is willing to use!

HEART TO HEART:  DON’T PROCESS-PRAY.  THEN PROCESS ALL THAT HE SPEAKS TO YOU!