Heart Matters  

“Even my own familiar friend whom I trusted, Who ate my bread, Has lifted up his heel against me.” Psalm 41:9

If I were to ask you what do you think I mean when I use the phrase “set up to sin”, I’m sure you’d think I’m referring to the obvious, to being lured in some way into some sort of temptation to commit the sins of the flesh.  It makes logical  sense to think of coming face to face with those outright sinful things we would just love to partake of and indulge in; the things we’ve turned away from and have no intentions of returning to. Most of us know the areas in which we have a propensity to sin. Those places for which we’ve purposely established boundaries to keep ourselves from stumbling and falling.  When the word “sin” is spoken, it doesn’t take long for our memory to recall our record, the areas in which we have been repeated offenders.  Our history prevents us from being oblivious to our capacity to sin.

The term “set-up” has to do with deception. It refers to one being tricked into participating in something they initially had no intention of doing or being accused of something they didn’t do.  In this post, I’m referring to the former.  I’m utilizing the idea of a “set-up” in terms of  unexpectedly finding oneself in a situation in which the probability for the occurrence of  sin has become very high-all of a sudden.  I’m suggesting a time when you thought it was okay for your guard to be down-but you were wrong, and to your disbelief you’ve now found yourself in a place very conducive to your old habitual sin.  It’s that space where your initial response to the chilling change of climate, when left unchecked even for a brief second will automatically be a sinful one.  Think of that area of your life where you can easily find yourself struggling not to respond sinfully, the one you avoid with all your might, the place where once taken there, it takes some serious spiritual fortitude not to “go there”- to that old familiar sinful reaction.

I’m not referring to any old place that tempts you to sin, but rather the places where you thought you were safe and the possibility of sinning, to you, wasn’t even an option.  I’m speaking of the times you’ve been in the “right” company, the “right” environment, with the “right” circumstances and yet something still went incredibly wrong.  Later when you reflect back, you realize that you were indeed “set-up” to sin.  However, it wasn’t because you didn’t have the proper boundaries, but rather because one or more of those boundaries has been breached by the devil and all of a sudden that which was considered to be part of your alliance has been infiltrated and the neutral ground has become enemy territory.

I believe that there’s a method the enemy uses to set us up so we can sin and it’s one he’s been sneakily utilizing time and time again.  And yet we fall for it repeatedly because of our unwillingness to accept that even in the places that are closest to our hearts, we must still be alert, prayed up, and on guard because our safety zones are still vulnerable to becoming an hostile environment. Proximity can be a breathing ground for our proclivities.  And so, for the enemy this is a sweet spot because he know’s it usually is a victory guaranteed.  I have become convinced that the devil routinely and effectively “sets us up to sin” through those who are closest to us and who are also either weak in the faith or are not in the faith altogether.

He uses the weakest links with whom we have to or have chosen to do life with- because he knows it will get us almost each and every time.  He uses that loved one you’ve asked and pleaded with to change or not to repeat the same offense towards you again and again.  He uses that one with whom there’s already such an intimacy-you will feel free to respond in your flesh with them without ever giving it a second thought because you believe they will know the true intent of your heart. He uses the one that you’re determined to get it right with because every time you sin and fail the enemy knows the frustration and sin will consume you.  He uses the ones who profess their love for you but their selfishness or self-centeredness continually prevents them from loving you right.  For them, being right, getting their way, and remaining true to themselves wins out each and every time. And so you find yourself feeling as though you either have no choice but to sin or as though your have every right to respond sinfully.  It’s a set up.

Sometimes you think you’ve made a breakthrough with them (those loved ones who can easily set you up to sin) due to those times they’ve actually apologized for their behavior; those times they caught themselves in the midst of the offense and changed course; those times they’ve temporarily ceased from the behavior.  But it’s not long before the battle resumes and you find yourself fighting for what’s right and perhaps once again being hurt and wounding the very ones you love. Even worse you find yourself sinning again and disappointing the ONE who despite all your rebellion and revelry, died for you anyway. You find yourself having to face the hard truth, that you gave in to your flesh-again, and now you have to fess up and ask The LORD to forgive you – for the same sin – once again.

Why are there those whom we love who will provoke us so? Why does the Lord allow such things to happen to us-and so close to home at that?  Well I truly believe that it’s like what Joseph said concerning the malevolence his brothers committed against him.  While the devil means it for evil, God meant it for good.  We’re never more like Jesus than when we’re being persecuted and attacked and yet we respond through sacrifice and love. Our loved ones who have allowed themselves to become stumbling blocks in our lives are not only being used by the enemy; no-because we belong to God, and especially if we are walking with God, even when they turn on us, they’re still serving the purposes of God in our lives. Now is it His perfect will for His children to be used and mistreated over and over again? I don’t think so, but there’s a mystery that resides in the place of man’s God-given right to choose, and God’s Sovereignty.  We can’t fully understand it.  But I believe nothing supersedes the Sovereignty of God.  As such, we can say HE either causes it or allows it. We can trust that He doesn’t let anything go to waste in His children’s lives.   We live in a fallen world and every time we deal with the repercussions of it we’re being given the chance to grow spiritually and respond in faith. We live in a world in which God has given us the freedom of choice and every time someone close to us chooses wrong and it hurts us, we have an opportunity to identify with the cross of Christ. We live in an unfair and unjust world and we’re being given opportunities to live out the Gospel in the midst of it!

Sin begets sin…that is unless one party breaks the cycle and respond in light of their salvation.  The devil wants us to respond sinfully to those who readily choose sin, but we must’n.  Instead we should see it as a time to “work out our salvation”.  We should know that since the Holy Spirit lives in us, we can respond in a way that’s pleasing to God.  We can forgive quickly, think of the other person as being more import than ourselves, love with the love of Christ Jesus.  I’m not saying that we shouldn’t become angry.  I’m saying the Lord says we’re to be angry and sin not.  We need to operate completely out of the wisdom and power of the Lord.  The Bible teaches us what to do and The Holy Spirit equips us how to do it.   We can trust and rely on The Holy Spirit to empower us to do so. But if we fail we can confess our sins and HE will forgive us over and over again.  Praise GOD! HE will forgive us and so we too should always choose to forgive our loved ones.

We can never change another person’s heart.  We can never control another person’s actions.  We’re only responsible for ourselves-before the Lord.  While it may be true that you were provoked, that you were attacked, that you were mistreated, that you were caught off guard-none of it’s an excuse to sin.  I’m convinced that the root of may wrong heart attitudes lies in the persons refusal to take their focus off the wrong they’ve suffered and hold themselves responsible for how they’ve wrongly responded.

God has allowed us to be uniquely woven into the families and relationships we’ve been given.  So how do we navigate our lives with those who can so easily hurt and wound us? How do we survive when we began to realize that some of the people we’ve given our hearts to, can and have hurt our hearts the most?  Well the answer is always found in the Word of God.  This one in particularly will help us to have the proper perspective and the proper boundaries:  Jesus told His disciples “Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation.  The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.” Mark 14:38  

Daily we need to be alert , prayed up, covered in the full armor of God so that we can recognize the wiles of the enemy so we can respond in wisdom.  Living in this world in relationships with others can make us very vulnerable.  Relationships always include the risk of allowing ourselves to be open to being hurt and offended by the same person over and over again.  But its also an opportunity to extend our testimony and allow Christ to do His work in their lives-over and over again!

HEART TO HEART: THOSE CLOSEST TO US CAN HURT US THE MOST, BUT OUR RIGHT RESPONSES CAN BLESS THEM EVEN MORE.